Hi! My name is Katya, and I. Am. AN ALIEN!
At least that’s what I grew up hearing.
This story begins when i was about 5ish years old. See I was the annoyingly eccentric younger sister. My two oldest sisters were about 8 and 12. They had a bunch of barbies and a home made doll house that my mom put together with a bookshelf and milk cartons.
I just wanted to play! But noooooo my ideas were too crazy! I wanted there to be villains and barbies killing each other over men. You know, like in all those telenovelas our mom watched.
They had enough and decided to give me a taste of my own medicine by making up a story of their own…..
They began their grand scheme by breaking the news of my adoption.
See one cold Halloween night, while walking home down an alley, after trick or treating, they heard an eerie sound. There appeared to be a baby crying inside a dumpster!
It was me, I was that baby.
My alien parents threw me away because I cried too much! My new human parents couldn’t live with themselves if they didn’t take me home.
Devastated, I ran to my mom asking if it was true. She reassured me I was her baby BY BIRTH and I was NOT found in a dumpster. I mean, I looked just like her right?!
My sisters had an answer to that too.
My alien genes attached themselves to the first human I came in contact with. I was, in fact, an alien from outer space who just knew how to blend in.
My entire life had been a lie!
Once my dad got home, I asked him if it was true. And guess what?! HE WENT ALONG WITH IT!!!
He went on to tell me the same story of how he jumped in that dumpster to rescue me. His brand new alien baby.
If my dad admitted it to my face, it MUST be true right?!
The saddest part of it all is, I’m pretty sure I believed them!
Yeah, yeah! Go ahead and laugh! I laugh at me too.
And that is why my family calls me The Alien.